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The Only School That Will Teach You How to Write a Good Letter

I’ve been fascinated lately with letters and notes. I can’t get enough of the beautiful examples here.

Handcrafted correspondence.

A sweet “hello,” or a, “hey, do you remember that one thing that happened that one time that was so funny/sad/amazing/tragic/wonderful?”

We don’t really write these kinds of notes to each other anymore.

Yes, there is a downside the internet.

On the upside, my mailman now delivers our mail by 9am nearly every morning. And yet every upside has an underbelly as we know, so while that convenience certainly serves me, I know it’s because he has half as much mail to deliver, and is danger of losing his job entirely.


Where am I going with this?

Writing letters - writing good letters - be they physical, metaphorical or otherwise, in my opinion, is the primary job of the artist, the pastor, the therapist, or the human who wants to connect.

Let me explain.

Last week I wrote a post about how my grandmother sent me a book for Christmas on the Pacific War. I had almost thrown it away when I realized there was a note on the very last page. The note mentioned how as I read the book, I would find my grandfather’s name and the names of his brothers. The book I was holding in my hand wasn’t trash, it was my story. But I wouldn’t have known that unless my grandma had written me that note. Her little note connected me to a larger story.

It seems to me the only way one gets another (or yourself, for that matter) to enter their story is by penning them a note that says something as simple as:

“Hey you! This story - this big, wide story - is your story too.”

“Penning” can look like a sentence spoken in a therapist’s office, a good word from a friend, a beautiful piece of art, or even a lovely song.

But don’t let my simple phrase fool you.

Writing a good note to someone - helping them understand a bit of themselves more deeply, meanwhile connecting them to a larger story, is hard work.

Like, really hard.

I think we can all admit there are a lot of crappy storytellers and note writers out there.

Am I right? Am I right?

Back in the day, and I’m sure they exist still somewhere in the South or in East Coast boarding schools, classes were led by ladies like Emily Post that taught a person how to write a letter.

Heading. Greeting. Body. Closing. Warm Regards. Touch of perfume. Etc.


But how do you go about learning how to write a letter like I’m talking about?

A note that moves someone to enter a bigger story? One that reminds them of the story that is theirs and only theirs?

Where do you go to learn that?

The only place I know of that will teach you to write a letter like what I’m describing is the Seattle School of Psychology & Theology.

In 2006 I began learning how.

It took a heavy heart, lots of tears, lots of papers, and a vision for a future where these kinds of notes were essential for helping people to understand their story.

6 years later and I think I’m just now really starting to do it. But I wouldn’t even know where to begin without my 2 years wading through the fog of the Puget Sound at The Seattle School.

(Photo by my friend and fellow Seattle School alum, Mr. Joshua Longbrake)

Until my dying day, I will get everyone who will listen to consider spending a few years in the Pacific Northwest learning to write good notes.

The Seattle School has a preview weekend coming up on March 2-3. You should go. Period.



Click here for are the details.

Additionally, they’ve got some incredible new programs that may interest you: Leadership and the New Parish, and the Lay Leader Certificate Program for leaders who want to explore how to more effectively engage the issues of story through a narrative framework within relationships.

Let me reiterate what I said before:
Writing letters - writing good letters - be they physical, metaphorical or otherwise, in my opinion, is the primary job of the artist, the pastor, the therapist, or the human who wants to connect the world to a larger story.
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Wallpaper Wednesday

Today’s installment comes from my friend, graphic and motion designer, Mr. Zach Taylor. Be sure and check out his stuff and while you’re at it, hire him!

Quoting from my book, UNTITLED, Thoughts on the Creative Process (currently on sale), Zach reminds us:

You are not a salesman. You are a storyteller.

You’ll find versions for your desktop, iPad, and iPhone below.

Download: Desktop / iPad iPhone

If you’re interested in contributing a wallpaper, have a look at the very brief, brief, and then shoot me an email

CREATIVE BRIEF:

Create a lovely wallpaper for desktop, iPad, & iPhone, with an image and/or quote inspired by my book, UNTITLED: Thoughts on the Creative Process. I will then giveaway said wallpaper on my site for all the world to see!

You don’t subscribe? That’s silly! Do so right now why don’t you?

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It’s Everywhere I Look

Yesterday, I sat in a circle with some of my favorite artists and people. We went around the room doing a very simple exercise I learned from Seth Godin.

Two questions were asked:

What are you afraid won’t work?

What are you afraid will?

I began.

I’m afraid the anti-anxiety medication I’ve been taking for the last few months won’t work. I’m afraid therapy won’t work. And so, I’m afraid I will always feel the way I’m feeling now.

Conversely, I’m afraid of the “yes.” If people say “yes” to the ideas I’m working on, I’ll then have to actually make them and that scares me.

One by one, my friends spoke their fears outloud. There were follow-up questions, tears, and comforting remarks.

It was beautiful.

I left feeling elated and also terribly sad.

Fear is everywhere I look.

Thus, I imagine it’s staring you in the face right now as well.

So today, I ask you what I asked my friends:

What are you afraid won’t work?

What are you afraid will?

Go.

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Wallpaper Wednesday

A few weeks ago, I got a crazy idea.

I would email some of my favorite designers and photographers the following creative brief:

Create a lovely desktop wallpaper with an image and/or quote inspired by my book, UNTITLED: Thoughts on the Creative Process. I will then giveaway said wallpaper on my site for all the world to see!

One of the unique pleasures of my little life is knowing some amazing artists. And guess what? Some of them said, “yes.”

Now, I’m not sure if I’ll have enough to do this every week, but here is the first installment from my friend, Allie Lehman, a fantastic designer heralding from Columbus, Ohio. The quote she chose:

“Becoming a great artist is about sitting and paying attention to the world that is passing everyone else by.”

You can download a version of her wallpaper for your desktop, iPad, and/or iPhone below.

Enjoy and be sure to head over to Allie’s site to check out more of her work.

Download: Desktop / iPad / iPhone

Subscribe and stay up to date!

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Our Work is This:

A week or so after Christmas, a heavy package arrived in the mail.

It was from my Grandma Laila. Well into her nineties, she’s a tough, midwestern broad; sweet, a former schoolteacher and Rosie the Riveter, and conservative estimates would put her around 4 1/2 feet tall. She lives alone in a tiny house on the edge of Hoffman, Minnesota - population 672. My grandpa lives in a nursing home nearby, and while I’ve known him my whole life, he isn’t my real grandfather.

But, I’m getting ahead of myself.

The package, as I mentioned, was heavy - unusually so, given that what normally comes from my grandma is a shirt from Herberger’s that’s too big, which I then need to exchange at our local Carson Pierie Scott (new underwear here I come!).

This was decidedly, not a shirt.

Two layers of wrapping paper later revealed a book. An old looking book. A book about the 164th Infantry during the Pacific War entitled, They Were Ready.

If you know that scene in Christmas Vacation where the family realizes Aunt Bethany has wrapped up her cat, you’ll know what I was feeling. My grandma, the sharp tack of a woman who never writes down when she’s handing out the Eucharist at Lincoln Lutheran Farm Church; my grandma, who remembers just about everything, had lost it.

She had grabbed a random book from her shelf, wrapped it up, and sent it to me as a present.

My stomach sank.

I flipped through it absentmindedly as I walked to the trash can.

No. Oh no. I can’t keep this depressing artifact representing my grandma’s decline into madness.

And just as I opened the cabinet door under our sink, my eye caught something.

On the very last page, scribbled in pencil, was this note:

Dear Blaine,

After reading this book you will have a better understanding of Grandma Burns (Eddy). He had a hard time dealing with the aftermath of the war. He was 21 years old. He was in the National Guard out of Fargo - the 164th Infantry. He witnessed the deaths of many of his dear friends and buddies. It took its toll on him. You’ll find his name and his brother’s, Buddy and Pete, in this book.

Oh.

I got it.

This book wasn’t a random gift, pulled from the shelves of a woman on the verge of memory loss.

This book wasn’t a story about a war that had nothing to do with me.

This book was a story about my family.

This book was a story about me.

And I had almost thrown it away.

Things like this really do a number on me. In fact, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about all the connections.

Knowing that my Grandpa Burns came back from the war a traumatized, 21 year-old, helps me understand my grandparent’s divorce and my grandma’s re-marriage to a man named, Dennis, who now lives in a nursing home on the other side of town.

Knowing what my Grandpa Burns had seen with this young eyes and then knowing that he began drinking soon after his return from the war, helps me understand my own addictions.

Knowing that my Grandpa Burns and his brothers were given purple hearts for having all three been shot (and survived) with the same bullet, helps me believe there might be bravery inside my own heart.

But I wouldn’t have known any of this if my Grandma hadn’t included her note.

***************

I’m reading a lot these days in preparation for our Easter services. I’m reading and re-reading Genesis and the story of Israel. I’m reading Sean Gladding’s, The Story of God, the Story of Us, along with Scot McKnight’s new book, The King Jesus Gospel.

And as I read these texts, I keep realizing that the stories contained within aren’t merely historical.

They aren’t simply random stories sent by a random God.

They are stories about my family.

They are stories about me.

As I read, the stories remind me that my darkness isn’t that different from my ancestor’s.

They also remind me of the beauty and glory I was made to magnify and create myself.

It occurs to me then, that our work is this:

To write notes to ourselves and to one another, reminding us of the story we’re all apart of.

If we don’t do this, and don’t do so humbly and with our whole hearts, we give ourselves, and our friends, no good reason not to throw the story right in the trash.

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It’s Back! Happy Friday Dance Party #5

One day I’ll tell you why I do these, but until then, here’s the next installment. Enjoy.

Music: Domino by Jessie J

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Sideways Snow

My view today as I was workin’ it.

Music: No One Said It Would Be Easy by Cloud Cult

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I Need a New Liturgy

I grew up Catholic and while there is much I don’t miss of the thousands and thousands of hours I spent at Mass, there is a tremendous amount I do.

I miss the practice of confession, the orientation of the church calendar, the put-a-dollar-in-to-light-a-candle corner.

But what I miss most is the liturgy.

Living in the land of church that consists of “every week should be a surprise,” I deeply long for the regulating and centering power a liturgy has to offer (of course I know the grass isn’t always greener and that even the liturgy can bore this post-modern boy to death).

Still…

I long for some order of things.

Enter, A New Liturgy -  a project created and curated by my very good friend, Aaron Niequist.

About a year or so ago, he started telling me about a dream he had of creating a series of compact, audible liturgies that people could listen to wherever they were; thus transforming their drive to work or their run around the lake into a sacred space.

Aaron writes:

A New Liturgy is our attempt to create holy space wherever we find ourselves. A moveable, sonic sanctuary. Released quarterly, each Liturgy is a 25 minute journey of music, prayer, scripture, and space that helps open us to The Almighty in any location, season, or emotion. I really need this.

So do I, in fact.

I loved it from the first demo I heard and have loved it ever since.

Aaron and a cadre of my friends are now onto their second offering - Blessed to Be a Blessing and a third one around confession (my favorite subject) is in the works.

If you’re longing for some space, or if you’re longing to create some.

If you’re longing to orient the bits of your life, or for a bit of order of things, then I suggest you download A New Liturgy 1 & 2 immediately.

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A Prayer for the Year Ahead

Happy new year, my friends. Good to see you again!

I hope the holidays and the new year are treating you well.

I don’t know about you, but I love this time of year. It’s when we pause and say to the world, to each other, and to ourselves we want this year to be different.

There’s an excitement in the air. There’s deep hope. Tremendous anticipation. Our hearts beat fast as we imagine the possibilities of what could be.

Whether you officially made a resolution this year, I’m sure everyone reading this has probably made some kind of quiet resolution of wanting something in their life to be different this year.

I think resolutions are so important. No one ever changes on accident. But this business of becoming more human, growing, changing - it can be so hard.

Because of this fact, I’m certain that there are many of us who are already feeling the painful sting of shame for not being able to keep our resolutions for even a week. That thing we said we definitely we weren’t going to do, we did. Or, that thing we said we definitely were going to do, we didn’t.

It’s heartbreaking and I know exactly how you feel.

We resolve, we commit, we write it down, post it on our blogs, and yet we just can’t always seem to follow through. I suppose it’s no wonder, a recent NY Times article actually said that humans are made with a limited supply of stick-to-itiveness and willpower.

So then, maybe there’s something we’re missing here. Maybe we’re not supposed to be doing this thing on our own. Maybe we weren’t created to power-through - to dominate the world, or ourselves into change.

In the scriptures, Peter writes the following:

His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. 4 Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature, having escaped the corruption in the world caused by evil desires. - 2 Peter 1:3,4

New Years resolutions often tend to be about us working hard, us making things happen, us digging deep, but as we’ve seen and possibly experienced already this past week, our powers are limited. I know mine are.

Throughout all of scripture, there’s a secret Jesus is trying to tell us:

God is right here waiting to help us become the people He’s made us to be.

We just don’t always realize it. We can’t accept it. We can’t believe it.

I mean what if this thing Peter describes as divine power is actually real? It seems like it would change everything.

So maybe what we need today, a good, healthy week into the new year, is to remind ourselves and each other that this divine power to become the people God created us to be, is real.

Perhaps it is true that God has already given us everything we need for life and godliness.

Perhaps it is true that God and his divine power is waiting here to help us become the people we desperately hope we will become this year.

This last weekend, I led our community in a time of prayer, inviting God and His divine power to literally infiltrate our lives and I’d like to invite you to do the same.

If you wouldn’t mind, I’d like to ask that you place your open hands on your lap. As we pray, we must realize that what we’re asking for is a gift to be received with open hands and not the clenched fists of mere will-power and resolve.

Let us pray.

First, for OUR RELATIONSHIPS - Our families and our friends. The broken relationships we endeavor to fix and the ones we’ve deemed unfixable. God we invite your divine power into this area of our lives.
 
OUR FINANCES - We thank you for the gift of resources; we realize every dollar is an abundant gift from you. We pray we will manage these gifts wisely. God we invite your divine power into this area of our lives.
 
OUR WORK - First for those of us without employment, we join with you now, praying for work to come our way. For those of us who find ourselves with gainful employment, we ask that you would be with us at our desks, in our homes, in our cars, on planes and in hotels, in our meetings, and in our conversations. God we invite your divine power into this area of our lives.
 
OUR ADDICTIONS & THE THINGS WE WRESTLE WITH - Whether it be sex, food, alcohol, drugs, or something else - we admit we’re all wrestling with something. God we invite your divine power into this area of our lives.

OUR DESIRES & DREAMS - For the desires in our hearts - the things we long to do, to get right, to be better at in the new year. For our deepest hopes and dreams. God we invite your divine power into this area of our lives.
 
OUR FEAR - For the fears that keep us from taking risks and from telling the truth of who we really are. God we invite your divine power into this area of our lives.

His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them we may participate in the divine nature, having escaped the corruption in the world caused by evil desires.

Therefore, my brothers and sisters, make every effort to confirm your calling and election. For if you do these things, you will never stumble, and you will receive a rich welcome into the eternal kingdom of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.

Amen.

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